a.C.i.D

i have to trust you for the next five to seven hours

as i will be under the influence of something i am not familiar with

i hope you do not lead me to the sea and drown my weary bones

or take me to the forest and leave me to wonder

i hope you do not leave me by the roadside

or let me burn in some strange fire

i hope you do not feed me to the strange wolves

but most of all

i hope you do not even realise

i am to trust you for the next five to seven hours.

red thread.

is it best to love without regard?

Or

to love with complete knowing?

still i wonder,

how is it so perfect

between the others.

how is it they fit

as though

they have spent their lives

growing into the shapes

and colours they are

and in perfect unison

they move forward

content in the promise and security of the other

i long for separation from the self

separation from the burning need of understanding and adoration

separation from the continual pull toward that which in turn

will endure some sad form of separation

yet in that i fear even more

the truth of Merwin's words

Separation

Your absence has gone through me  

Like thread through a needle.  

Everything I do is stitched with its colour